How to be more Norwegian

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If you’re feeling inspired to move to Norway, it’s a good idea to find out what the people are like before you up sticks and go.
Bronte Aurell, author of North: How to Live Scandinavian, shares her tips on how to be more Norwegian:
- Go for a hike (ut på tur, literally out on tour) every weekend, ideally somewhere hilly.
- Always take a matpakke (packed lunch) wherever you go.
- Every weekend and holiday, go to a hytte (cabin). Any cabin. A garden shed can be used as a replacement. This is called hyttetur (cabin tour).
- Avoid looking directly at your fellow citizens in all urban areas, including pavements, public transport and shops. But remember to say ‘Hei hei’ (hello) to everyone when hiking.
- Every summer, go to Syden (the south) for two weeks’ vacation. Southern Scandinavian places do not count – it has to be south of the German border.
- Eat warm waffles with brown goat’s cheese at least once a week. When you get sick of waffles, eat a Grandiosa frozen pizza or a hotdog wrapped in a potato pancake.
- When having a conversation about anything, make sure to say ‘ikke sant’ a lot. Depending on your intonation, ikke sant can mean a range of different things, mostly on a spectrum of ‘Yes, I agree wholeheartedly’ – including, but not limited to:
• Ikke sant = yes, I agree
• Ikke sant? = do you agree?
• Ikke Sant! = YES
• Ikke SANT? = you’re kidding
• Ikke sant = yes, yes
• Ikke sant?! = I hear ya - Celebrate your flag every day of the year but especially on 17 May, Norway’s national day. On this day, purchase seven more flags for your collection.
- Norwegians are born with skis on their feet. Uncomfortable for the mothers, but useful once they learn to stand up and navigate down snow-covered mountains. If you can’t ski, don’t move to Norway.
- Sweden will never be better than Norway at anything. Apart from the price of everything (you shall never speak of this openly). Know that if a Swede beats a Norwegian at skiing it is always because of smørekrise (the way the skis are prepped) literally, ‘a crisis of lubrication’. It has nothing to do with the athletes themselves.
- Own at least one allværsjakke (all-weather jacket). A plus point if it is brightly coloured.
Taken from North by Bronte Aurell, £20 Aurum Press. Photo credits: Anna Jacobsen and Yuriy Garnaev on Unsplash