If you find it hard to say no to other people, even when it puts you under pressure, then you could be a people pleaser.
In this episode of the In The Moment podcast, we look at how to stop saying yes to every request and where our desire to please others comes from.
Natalie Lue says that these patterns often begin in childhood. We look to please our parents or teachers and receive praise, which reinforces our need to be helpful.
Listen to the podcast on Apple Podcasts/iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher and most major podcast providers, or online below.
“I think we’ve been socialised into being people pleasers,” says Natalie. “I think that when we’re children – I think it’s both sexes but particularly for girls – we are socialised to be good and kind and meek and mild. Don’t make waves; don’t make things awkward.
“The message then becomes please your parents and they will love you.”
In the podcast, we also discuss how to cope at work when handling requests from other people, especially when our first instinct is to say yes to anything people ask (very useful!).
The episode also covers how to say no to family, even when they are putting pressure on you.
You can find Natalie Lue’s column in In The Moment every month. You can also follow Natalie on Twitter and Instagram.